Treat Your Spouse Like a Stranger

by Stu Gray on September 7, 2009

Rainbow Vomit

Sometimes I am kinder to strangers than I am to my mate.

I can be flat out mean to my Beautiful Wife™ in the bread aisle, then 1 minute later, be kind as can be to the cashier at the register.

Why is that?

I take my spouse for granted.
She is too familiar.  I’m Not saying that I shouldn’t be familiar with her.

I am saying, that I take her for granted because she is familiar to me. I think I know my spouse better than I really do.

Many times, I don’t even stop to think, I just respond.

When I respond without thinking, or respond out of habit, or respond before she finishes her sentence- because I think I know what she is going to say…Many times I end up vomiting nasty or inappropriate words all over her.

I wouldn’t vomit all over a stranger would I?

What Other Ways Am I Nicer To Strangers?

It’s not just my words that are nicer to strangers…there are other little things that I do for strangers that I have stopped doing for my spouse because she is so familiar:

My LooksI get dressed up to go out with friends, or to work…and don’t dress up or keep well groomed for her.

Gracious BehaviorI hold the door for someone walking into the store, but let it go so my wife has to grab it and hoist it open (usually with the kiddo in tow).

SmilesI flash the pearly whites to strangers. As I walk away, I turn and give ‘scowl city’ to my wife.

My encouragement: Treat your Spouse Like a Stranger.

Talk to them nicely.

Smile at them.

Be Gracious to them.

Dress to impress them.

What did I miss?

Are there other ways we treat strangers better than our spouse? Leave me a comment. I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Photo by debaird

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

Kim July 12, 2010 at 1:36 am

Great Article!! Thank you! Posting a link in Facebook!

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Lara October 20, 2009 at 12:58 pm

wow…I’m always telling this to my bf. So true, so sad also :(

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Stu Gray October 20, 2009 at 1:35 pm

Hey Lara – Thanks for the comment – its something that I have to remind myself of often!!

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Lara October 20, 2009 at 6:58 pm

wow…I’m always telling this to my bf. So true, so sad also :(

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Stu Gray October 20, 2009 at 7:35 pm

Hey Lara – Thanks for the comment – its something that I have to remind myself of often!!

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The Marry Blogger September 8, 2009 at 2:29 pm

@Natalie – That is a great point – we let our spouses in to our day to day routines and that makes them special…I guess that’s why communication is so important – what is the line in your marriage between “it’s special because no one else sees me this way” and “Lettin’ one rip like one of the guys”!!

@Marvin – Thanks so much!!

Reply

The Marry Blogger September 8, 2009 at 8:29 pm

@Natalie – That is a great point – we let our spouses in to our day to day routines and that makes them special…I guess that’s why communication is so important – what is the line in your marriage between “it’s special because no one else sees me this way” and “Lettin’ one rip like one of the guys”!!

@Marvin – Thanks so much!!

Reply

Marvin September 8, 2009 at 9:46 am

Love this article! Posted a link on my blog.

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Marvin September 8, 2009 at 3:46 pm

Love this article! Posted a link on my blog.

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Natalie September 7, 2009 at 5:42 pm

This is mucho true, I get so comfortable around my hubs that I let myself go a bit around him. In a way that’s treating him more special, in other ways, i.e. passing gas, it’s just not good.

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Natalie September 7, 2009 at 11:42 pm

This is mucho true, I get so comfortable around my hubs that I let myself go a bit around him. In a way that’s treating him more special, in other ways, i.e. passing gas, it’s just not good.

Reply

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